I am applying to (Name of School) for the Masters of Social Work program. My career goal is to work with underprivileged adolescents, especially those with a history of behavioral and emotional problems. I have significant background in this area; in addition to a full-time position with a recruitment firm, I am a relief counselor for this target group in a residential treatment setting. I want to complement this practical experience with specialized training in order to best serve these individuals.
点评:开篇直入主题,说明自己正在申请社会工作硕士这个项目,点明了自己的职业目标以及目前所从事的相关工作,为下文埋下伏笔。
My desire for this profession springs from the troubles of my childhood. In my youth, I was a ward of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts--in essence, a foster child. Both of my birth parents abused me physically and emotionally, prompting the courts to permanently remove me from their power. I subsequently moved through a succession of foster homes and adolescent shelters. My high school years were therefore highly traumatic; I could not have survived them without the aid of the counselors and social workers that were so kind to me. Yet my problems did not end at the emotional level. I constantly battled financial difficulties in order to graduate high school and embark on a college career. I was essentially paying my way through college on minimum wage--a monumental task. My first two years of college proved quite difficult because of this. But I persevered, and achieved an overall G.P.A. of 3.5 during my final two years at school. I also dedicated much time to campus activities, in which I held a number of leadership positions.
点评:作者介绍了自己艰苦的童年和艰难的专业学习过程,但是童年的经历不仅仅是要表达作者的毅力,更重要的是要表达他自己的亲身经历,会让他对社会工作这个职业有更深入得理解和认识。而且在艰苦的条件下取得了良好的成绩,又从一方面体现了作者学习的才能。这种个性的经历会让申请人的背景与众不同。
Today, I work with an international recruitment firm that allows me to travel through the United States and Europe. This has given me a sense of accomplishment and maturity, yet I feel a deep void in my life. I need to give back to the community that helped me so much. I know what it is like to be on the “receiving end” of social work--I was the one who stayed with foster families after the social workers had gone home. I am thus in a unique position to understand the conflicts within the hearts of troubled adolescents. I comprehend, for instance, the importance of such issues as trust. And a child in this setting would be naturally more inclined to trust someone who has already experienced “the system” firsthand.
点评:本段重点介绍了作者的内心世界,由于童年的经历激发了自己对这个行业的热爱,并明白对于这样的人更能和有过类似经历的人更亲近。这样的优势是任何其他申请人所不具备的,这自然会让作者比其他申请人更具有优势。
My background, my ambition, and my resourcefulness are ample demonstration of the valuable addition I would be to your social work program. I share close bonds of understanding with my target community, and feel that I can make a significant difference in their lives with the aid of a Master’ s Degree in Social Work from your institution.
点评:前几段已经对自己学习动机的产生,自己亲身经历和专业经历进行了很好的阐述,在结尾总结性的直接陈述了自己的优势,说明自己的价值能通过这个项目为学校以及同学带来积极的影响。
整体点评:
文章大纲:
本文分四个部分,第一部分开篇直入主题,说明自己正在申请社会服务硕士这个项目,点明了自己的职业目标以及目前所从事的工作,为下文埋下伏笔。
第二段部分,主要介绍了自己艰苦奋斗的经历,一方面在情感上打动读者,最重要的无形的体现了通过个人经历体现他在这方面的丰富经历。
第三部分主要描写自己的心理活动,展示了内心的转变以及申请这个项目的决心。
第四部分直接阐述了自己的价值以及能为对方学校带来的影响。
主题内容:
本文由作者小时候坎坷的经历为主线,体现了自己坚强的毅力和艰苦奋斗的精神,突出了自己在社会工作这方面的情感和兴趣, 正是由于这些深刻的经历说明自己适合社区服务这个项目。
素材取材:本文取材主要是根据自己的亲身经历和该专业特有的心理活动展开,衬托自己明确的目的。
立意:以自己的真实经历和心理活动为中心,表明对这个项目的适合。
可以借鉴的地方:
这篇文章是跨专业申请,但是转的非常自然,语言简练,而且主题表达明确,全篇逻辑很好。把PS中需要体现的兴趣、艰苦奋斗的过程以及相关的个性经历、自己的成就、对自身和今后发展的认识、出国学习的必要性和迫切性都表达出来了;并且充分体现了自己的价值。最值得借鉴的地方就是作者分析清楚了该专业的核心所在,并挖掘自己一起可用的资源进行阐述。有的放矢是我们一直要坚持的方法。
译文:
我正在申请社会工作方向的硕士项目,我的职业目标是和那些穷苦的青少年一起工作,尤其那些在行为和情绪上有过坎坷经历的人。我在这方面有重要的背景,我除了在一个猎头公司做全职之外,我还为目标群体在住宅待遇安置方面做调剂顾问。我想利用这个为个体服务的专门训练补充实践经历。
我对这个职业的渴望来源于我坎坷的童年。在我小的时候,我基本是在麻省行政监护下成长,因为我的亲生父母在身体上和精神上虐待我,促使法院将我和他们永久的解除了关系,我后来一直在一些抚养孤儿的家庭和青少年庇护所生活,因此我在中学阶段还有很深的创伤,如果没有援助顾问和社会工作者对我的关怀,我就不能活到现在。但是我的情绪并没有因此而平静,为了我能顺利地中学毕业以便进入大学学习,我坚持不懈地和经济困难作斗争;我靠学校超低的工资来勉强维持我的生活,所以我大学前两年非常的艰难,但是我坚持下来了,并且在最后两年我获得了3.5的GPA。此外,我还用了很多时间参加学校各项活动,胜任了许多领导职位。
现在我在一个国际猎头公司任职,这样就允许我在美国和欧洲之间穿梭。而且我就有了非常成熟完善的见识,但也我的内心世界感到空虚。我需要回到给我那么多帮助的社团。我清楚我最喜欢的职业还是做一名社会工作者,由于我曾经是其中的一员,因而我能够更容易理解这些贫困青少年内心的冲突。我理解,比如,信赖在这个问题中的重要性。一个孩子很容易一个也有着和自己同样经历的人等等。
我的背景,我的雄心和我的智谋非常充足的证明了我的价值。我会通过这个Master’ s Degree分享我的理解给周围的同学带来积极的意义。
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