文书点评：没有梦想和目标，生命是不完整的

Lives are incomplete with out dreams and goals

Our lives are full of dreams and goals. A long-term goal may be: I want to go to university after the high school, while a short term goal may be: I want to go to school on time tomorrow. Therefore dreams and goals are a part of our life. Even though it is hard to follow a dream sometimes dreams provide meaning and enrichment. In the film” October Sky “, directed by Joe Johnston, the main character Homer Hickhem has a dream of becoming a rocket scientist. During the way to get the goal, he becomes more mature to understand each other. Similarly in the novel Of Mice And Men by John Steinbeck. George and Lennie have a dream to get a piece of small land of their own, which makes their life more hopeful than others. In the same way, my big brother has a dream to get a PhD degree in physics. This dream is very powerful and this makes him to achieve his goal.

From the film “ October Sky “, the main character Homer Hickham has a dream to become a rocket scientist. If he didn’t have this dream, he would become a miner like his father. In his father’s mind, he would be a good son who follows in his father’s footsteps; but this is not what Homer actually wants, if he does like this  his life would be empty and hopeless. Because of his dream, he has to improve his math skills by talking with Quentin, a very intelligent student. He has to go against his father who does everything to change his mind. Even though it is a very hard time in his life , he accomplishes a great deal by the end of the film. His rocket flies successfully, he fixes the relationship between his father, and he finds a girl who truly loves him.

sometimes,Having and sharing a dream are not enough to bring it to fruition but it will make life more meaningful and more complete. In the novel Of “Mice and Men”, the main characters George and Lennie have a dream to make enough money to live” off the fat of the land “. They wish to be their own bosses someday. Because of this dream, they are staying out of trouble, not spending money on liquor or in bordellos, and working on a ranch as long as possible to save money for a down payment on the price of the land. That is why they look different from other men. Sharing a dream also improves their friendship and it becomes the other men’s dream too.

Another example which can prove why people need to set strong goals and dreams for themselves is my big brother’s experience. My big brother Cheng is now studying in the physics program of Wuhan University, and he wants to get a PhD degree of physics. He started interested in math and physics when he was in junior high. He put a great deal of effect into these subjects. Obviously he can always get a very good mark in physics and math. On the other hand, he was an awful student in language arts and social studies. He started to change his mind during the first year of high school when his teacher told him that if he didn’t get a good mark in language arts and social studies, he could not able to go university. He awaked and realized he had to work hard in these subjects. He changed his mind and decided to pay attention to language arts and social studies. As you know, he is at the university and successfully moves forward with his dream.

With out dreams, Homer would have to at the mine and spends his entire life in darkness. With out dreams, George and Lennie would have had to work at ranch and live like the other men, with out hope and a future. With out dreams, my big brother would not have a goal to achieve. Humans give meaning to their lives and their futures by creating dreams. Without dreams and goals, life is an endless, dark day that has little vital and meaning.

点评：

文章内容：

文章主要通过三个不同的例子来说明每个人都应该有让我们去奋斗的理想。第一个说的是电影中的人物Homer如何在家庭的压力和能力不足的情况下一直怀揣梦想，最终圆满收场。第二个例子讲斯坦拂克代表作《人鼠记》中的两个主人公，他们的梦想让他们有了一种和别人不一样的生活。最后一个例子是自己身边的事，关于作者的哥哥，通过努力从一个成绩平平的学生到名校大学生的过程。最后指出没有梦想的生活是多么乏力、漫长，而有了理想，生活就变的丰富且充满希望。

文章选题：

这篇文章大致可以归为“追求理想篇”。分别从电影、小说、身边找论据进行说明。

文章结构：

典型的三段式结构。开头提出观点，中间分三段来举例说明，结尾进行总结。

综合点评：

优点：1）结构还算清晰，采用三段式。各个部分的作用也都分别体现在文章中。2）从不同的角度选论据，使文章更具有说服力。

缺点：1）语法上的错误。2）文章中的一些句子和词经常重复，使文章显的拖沓，冗长。3）整篇文章的段落结构比较清晰（之所以说比较清晰是因为在地三段突然出现一个“分享梦想”的主题，和文章的主题并存，这样不但没有深化主题，反而使主题变得模糊起来），但是每个段落中的具体结构却有些乱，思路不清。